🎙️ LIVE FROM THE ROYAL WHISKER STUDIO:
“Whiskers & Wonders” – Episode: A Royal Interview with Prinssi
Hosted by: Lohe & Benno
(Opening mewsic plays. Lohe is in a miniature velvet cape. Benno is wearing a plastic crown slightly sideways. They sit proudly across from a majestic tabby with a commanding presence and slightly ruffled ear—Prinssi.)
👑 The Arrival
Lohe (bowing slightly):
“Ladies and gentlecats, tonight we are honored to welcome feline royalty. A guardian, a hunter, a biscuit-making lap purrer, and friend of the late King Basil—please give your warmest tail flick to… Prinssi!”
Prinssi (with a low royal purr):
“Thank you, noble kittens. I have walked many rooftops to be here.”
Benno (whispers):
“I think he smells like shrimp and wisdom.”
🎤 Round 1: Origins of Royalty
Lohe:
“Let’s begin at the beginning. Tell us, noble Prinssi, how did your hoomin find you?”
Prinssi:
“I was but a humble wanderer, surviving on instinct and raindrops. One day, a kind hoomin saw potential in me… took me in, offered warmth and kibble. I stayed. The house became my castle.”
Benno:
“Were there trials? Dragons? Dogs?”
Prinssi:
“Once, a hedgehog looked at me the wrong way. I simply blinked him into submission.”
🎤 Round 2: Kingdom Duties & Past Bonds
Lohe:
“We heard you were close with… King Basil.”
Prinssi (pauses, tail flicking gently):
“A true monarch. We spent many sunbeams together. He ruled indoors. I patrolled the outdoors. Sometimes we disagreed… claws were shown… but always with respect.”
Benno (softly):
“We never met him, but we feel his legacy.”
Prinssi:
“And he would’ve liked you both. Especially your zoomies.”
🎤 Round 3: Gifts, Snacks & Secrets
Lohe:
“We heard you bring gifts to your hoomin?”
Prinssi:
“Indeed. Mice. Once a sock. I believe in giving back. Symbolic offerings, you know.”
Benno:
“Do the gifts have to be… wiggly?”
Prinssi:
“Not always. But the dramatic effect helps.”
Lohe:
“Favorite food?”
Prinssi (without hesitation):
“Shrimps. The small pink jewels of the sea. I would sell my tail tip for a shrimp buffet.”
🎤 Bonus Round: Biscuit-Making & More
Benno:
“You make biscuits?”
Prinssi:
“With purpose. On laps only. Preferably after sunset. Bonus points if the hoomin is wearing black.”
Lohe:
“Do you ever sleep?”
Prinssi:
“I meditate in 3-hour power cycles.”
Benno:
“Do you ever get bored?”
Prinssi:
“I chase leaves and question reality at 2am like every other cat.”
🎤 Reflection & Farewell
Lohe:
“Prinssi, you’ve lived many lives in one. Any advice to younger cats?”
Prinssi:
“Claim your space. Respect your hoomin. And always… always pee outside the litter box only if it’s political.”
Benno (wide-eyed):
“He’s a genius.”
Prinssi (rising slowly):
“Thank you, young lords. Now, if you’ll excuse me… I believe there’s a shrimp in the moonlight calling my name.”
Lohe & Benno (in unison):
“All hail Prinssi!”
🎬 End of Interview
Next week on Whiskers & Wonders: “Is Your Human Hiding Snacks? – The Scent-Based Investigation” 🐾